In this 2nd article, Hugh Patterson discusses how they use their Insights Discovery Profiles to manage conflict within the team.
Group Conflict
Before setting out on our 3-year circumnavigation a common question we were asked was “What are you afraid of? Storms? Pirates?” Our reply? Killing each other! That was our biggest fear; would we be able to get along? I realize now in hindsight that I didn’t actually understand what I meant by that. While we were all close friends before the trip, we knew that our commitment, tolerance and friendship would be tested. Now, after having sailed half way around the world with two best friends and experienced all the facets of the trip thus far, I know full well what it means. And yes, without a doubt the getting along is without a doubt the hardest part!
We live in very close quarters, and share every aspect of life with each other. We see more of each other than most married couples. Not only do we cook, clean, eat, sleep and live all in a space less than 150 square ft, but every decision we make, from sailing, safety and travel itinerary, to maintenance and financial decisions involve a 3-way discussion. It can be at the most stressful times; in the middle of night, with howling wind and lashing rain that these decisions are made. It is inevitable that conflict arises.
Our forum for dealing with conflict is a one-on-one frank discussion with each member of the team. If one member of the team finds that both the other members have taken issue with something they have said or a way they have acted, then that person must reflect on what has been said and address the issue. However, an objective opinion can be difficult to find. The Discovery Profiles can serve well as an objective 2nd or 3rd opinion; both to help one understand how you are reacting to a situation, as well has how your fellow crew member might be as well. You might say we use the Profile as a 4th member of the team. Are my team members pointing out a blind spot that my Discovery Profile highlights as well? It is often an excellent unbiased opinion.
Understanding each member’s reaction to a situation or conflict is the first step in resolving the issue. But from there we have to reach a consensus. To “Get to Yes” we have used the Insights Communication profiles to understand how to best communicate with each other. Rarely do we have fundamental differences of opinion on certain subjects, but rather conflict has stemmed from misunderstanding or ineffective communication. An argument can arise simply because of the way in which one member of the team has presented their opinion. Not only is it a good insight into someone else’s best communication style, the profile has helped each person best understand how they can communicate with the other team members and how to improve their own communication style.
Our three crew members are
Ryan Robertson (Conscious wheel – 26: Motivating Inspirer / Personal Wheel – 26: Motivating Inspirer)
Bryson Robertson (Conscious wheel – 48:Inspiring Helper / Personal Wheel – 9: Supporting Helper)
Hugh Patterson (Conscious wheel – 34: Coordinating Observer / Personal Wheel 34: Coordinating Observer)